The Jolly Holly Herald - A Festive Holiday Story for Kids

It’s Jolly Holly season, and everyone in town is brimming with holiday cheer. The Society of Bards and Balladeers has come together to build the festive set for their annual event. There’s just one tiny problem: Redge has no idea what this year’s show should be! From classic Quilliam Shakespeare plays, to poetry readings and ballets, to comedy jests and holiday whodunnits, they've already done it all. Just when Redge thinks the show won't go on, Jonathan has a brilliant idea. So cue the lights, sparkle the snowflakes, and raise the curtain for this ode to our friends in Once Upon a Time and a heart-full tribute to our listeners (that’s YOU) who are the magic that makes our adventures so extraordinary.

Jolly Holly Hedgehog Holiday, our original song is featured in this episode! The full song with lyrics is available on Bandcamp: https://dorktalesstorytime.bandcamp.com/album/jolly-holly-hedgehog-holiday 

Go to the episode webpage: https://jonincharacter.com/the-jolly-holly-herald/  

GIFT FOR OUR FANS: Redge has a special video message for all of our listeners and you can download it here: https://bit.ly/2025RedgeHolidayMessage

DOWNLOAD JOLLY HOLLY WORKSHEET: https://bit.ly/dorktalesEP125worksheet    

IF YOU ENJOYED THIS STORY about Jolly Holly, you may also enjoy EP102: Pinocchio’s Jolly Holly Jumble: https://jonincharacter.com/pinocchios-jolly-holly-jumble/ 

CREDITS: This episode is a Jonincharacter production. It was written and produced by Molly Murphy and performed by Jonathan Cormur. Sound recording and production by Jermaine Hamilton at Pacific Grove Soundworks.

Four easy ways to support Dorktales to keep the mic on and the stories coming: donate, subscribe or follow, leave a review, tell a friend! All support links are here in the show notes below👇🙏

Chapters

• 1:43 Getting Ready for the Bards & Balladeers Holiday Event!
• 4:35 What's going on with Redge?
• 7:18 Jonathan has a brilliant idea!
• 8:53 Curtains Up! The Show Begins!
• 12:00 Credits, How to Contact Jonathan and Redge, Theme Song

Transcript

JONATHAN CORMUR: Hello Dork Squad. I'm Jonathan Cormur and you're listening to Dorktales Storytime, the podcast for kids and their pop culture-loving grown-ups, and this is one of our anything-is-possible lore stories.

THEME SONG: It's a beautiful day for a story, adventure and glory, new friends and old ones too. It's an excellent day to get swept away in a tail, so let us regale you.

The sounds of hammering and scuffling, some jingle bells, and twinkles. 

REDGE: (Calling out instructions) Bring the sign down just a smidge there, Big Bad! Oh perfect! And let’s make that set piece an even Jolly-er, and dare I say it… Holly-er shade of wintery blue, will you Glimmer? And let’s remember to add a touch of sparkle to those hanging snowflakes. 

JONATHAN: (Carrying something heavy) Hey, Redge! Where would you like me to put the Storyteller’s Chair? 

REDGE: Right in the middle of the book stacks! 

JONATHAN: (With effort) You’ve….got it! Whew! Everyone is working hard! The set looks amazing! I can’t believe you got all my books to stack so high! 

REDGE: Like the towers of a legendary castle! 

JONATHAN: Exactly! 

REDGE: Well, it's a very important event, and we have to go all out! The annual Bards & Balladeers show is the highlight of every Jolly Holly season! Just after the Firelight Festivals. Oh, and the scarf knitting circles. And the pie-baking contests. Oh! It’s impossible to pick, really! 

JONATHAN: It really is! But the Bards & Balladeers extravaganza is one of my personal highlights! So…I gotta know…what show are you putting on this year? 

REDGE: Oh…uh… hold on, I think Bob Gosse is calling me with questions about the choreography! 

JONATHAN: I didn’t hear anything…also, it looks like he’s on his lunch break. 

BOB GOSSE: A five, six, seven, ate my sandwich, now onto the apple! And bite, and bite, and toss, and jazz hands!

JONATHAN: Wow, he even eats in style. 

REDGE: Oh, right. It…must not have been him. Perhaps it was the hedge witch Zinnia-

JONATHAN: She seems content arranging flowers-

ZINNIA: (Humming to herself) 

REDGE: Oh, right. Oh! Right! It was definitely Big Bad. What was that you needed, Big Bad? 

BIG BAD: Huh? 

REDGE: You asked me a question? 

BIG BAD: Uh. What? What do you mean?  

REDGE: Ah. What do I mean? An excellent question indeed. What do any of us mean, after all? Jonathan, excuse me, I have to ponder this question for….oh, about a week or so, I think. 

JONATHAN: A…a week? Redge! The show is in a week! 

REDGE: (Nervously) Gulp. Oh….is it? 

JONATHAN: Redge, what’s going on? 

REDGE: (Mumbles something LIKE “I don’t know what to do for the Bards & Balladeers Jolly Holly Day Show incoherently) 

JONATHAN: What did you say? 

REDGE: (Mumbles something LIKE “I don’t know what to do for the Bards & Balladeers Jolly Holly Day show a tiny bit more coherently this time) 

JONATHAN: I can’t understand what you’re saying, Redge. 

REDGE: I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO FOR THE BARDS & BALLADEERS JOLLY HOLLY DAY SHOW! 

Gasps from the Folktale Forest.

JONATHAN: You…don’t know…?! But…you’re building the whole set! Right now! 

REDGE: I know! I thought I could just keep going until inspiration struck! But I’ve got nothing! 

JONATHAN: Ok, this is fine! Let’s see what we can come up with together! What about poetry! Everyone loves a good poem about winter and nature, right?

REDGE: Jonathan! We’ve already done that! Remember? Twas a Night Most Jolly Holly! 

JONATHAN: Oh…right…

 REDGE: Poems? We already know ‘em…s! 

JONATHAN: What about a classic? Like something from Quilliam Shakespeare, the greatest hedgehog bard in history! 

REDGE: We’ve already performed A Midwinter's Day Dream and the whole forest cheered for an encore for thirty straight minutes. So we did it again the very next Jolly Holly Day. 

JONATHAN: Oh yeah…Maybe dance? 

REDGE: I’ve already staged The Nutcracker!

JONATHAN: I love that ballet! 

REDGE: Yes! The one about the crow and the squirrel burying peanuts and acorns for winter?

JONATHAN: Oh, I thought you meant the ballet where toys come to life. And there’s a Mouse King.

CAM: Did you say Rat King? 

JONATHAN: Uh…close enough! 

REDGE: Hello, King Cam. M. Bert! How are the trains running? 

CAM: Smooth like butter! Which reminds me, you heard the one about butter? 

REDGE: No, I can’t say I have! 

CAM: Eh, I'd better not tell you, or it might spread…

REDGE: (Laughing hysterically) Spread! Like butter spreads on bread! Hahaha! 

CAM: Hey, what about a little comedy show for the festive season? I’ve been working on new material.

REDGE: I would, but…we hosted the Jolly Holly Jest a mere three years ago. 

CAM: Oh, right…I got a standing ovation. 

REDGE: You always do! 

JONATHAN: Alright then, a concert! With the Branch Sisters? 

REDGE: Hatchin’ the Holly Days with the Branch Sisters. And before you suggest it, we already do Jolly Holly Who Done Its with Sherlock Nettlesbee, and sometimes Big Bad hosts his Winter Wolf Skating Spectacular.  

JONATHAN: Oh, those are always a hoot. 

REDGE: (Sighs) Now you see my plight! The Bards & Balladeers have already put on every kind of show there is! We’ve read poetry, we’ve danced, we’ve joked…I just don’t know what to do this year, that’s new! Innovative! Fresh like a fine dusting of snow! 

JONATHAN: You’re right, Redge…you and all of the creatures here in the land of Once Upon a Time have used your amazing talents to do so much…and not just on Jolly Holly Day…I think I have an idea! 

REDGE: Really, Jonathan? I’m in! 

JONATHAN: Do you…Want to know what it is first? 

REDGE: No! Surprise me! Wait no, tell me! Wait! Surprise me! No! Tell me! Tell me! 

JONATHAN: Ok, here’s what I’m thinking… Instead of trying to top every kind of show you’ve done in the past, what if we do what we do best?

 REDGE: You want me to put together the world’s most stylish outfits and tastiest snacks?  

JONATHAN: Well, second best then. Storytelling.

REDGE: But, what kind of story?

JONATHAN: A story about us. About everyone who lives here. And about everyone who listens. Our listeners may not realize just how important they are to us. They’ve been part of every quest, every mystery, and every song, dance, snack, snazzy outfit, and story we’ve shared.

REDGE: That’s brilliant! A show that celebrates our listeners! Then what are we waiting for! Cue the curtains! Lights up! Glittering snowflakes, released! 

(The sound of an orchestra warming up, a chattering audience, and then the Jolly Holly instrumental plays)

REDGE: Good evening, and a very happy Jolly Holly Day to one and all! 

JONATHAN: All year long we’ve been visiting new places where we can imagine, wonder, problem-solve, get silly, and sometimes get lost before finding our way again.

REDGE: Just like following strings of Jolly Holly lights through a dark forest!

JONATHAN: That’s right, Redge! And we’re so grateful for every creature who makes the magic of Once Upon a Time come to life… from the tiniest mouse and even tinier pixie to our biggest and baddest of wolves.

BIG  BAD: (Offstage) Aw shucks, folks, I’m speechless …and blushin’ under all this fur.

REDGE: And most of all, we are grateful for you, dear listeners.

JONATHAN: So this year, our show is inspired by YOU because you are the most important part of every story we tell.

REDGE: Without further ado, please enjoy this year’s Bards and Balladeers presentation! The Jolly Holly Herald: An Ode to the Land of Once Upon a Time, and YOU! 

JONATHAN: Once Upon a Time, 

in a land that just so happened to be called Once Upon a Time, 

there lived such things as ballet dancing crows and ice skating wolves, 

brilliant bird bands and hedge witches, 

inventive princesses and fabulous fairies. 

And there lived a very stylish and snack-loving hedgehog, 

with a very big heart. 

REDGE: Oh, that’s me!

Together with his best friend,

JONATHAN: That’s me! 

REDGE: The hedgehog journeyed far and wide

to a Rat King’s lair filled with magical trains, 

Behind a waterfall to a land of dinosaurs

Into Wonderland, Slumberland and places no one’s named yet! 

JONATHAN: They visited mythic kingdoms, a tiny pixie town, 

An underwater village, a pirate-filled island

And met critters and creatures, fine folks and friends

All with big and beautiful dreams.…

REDGE: But here’s the secret, the sparkly, twinkly truth

They never traveled alone.

JONATHAN: YOU were right there with them every step of the way

Listening, wondering, imagining,

And adding new ideas to every story. 

REDGE: Yes, YOU helped cast the magic

Because YOU are the magic! 

JONATHAN: And that’s why on this Jolly Holly Day

And every, single day -

REDGE: We celebrate You! 

JONATHAN/REDGE: Happy Jolly Holly Day! 

JONATHAN CORMUR: This has been a Jonincharacter production. This story was written and produced by Molly Murphy, and performed by Jonathan Cormur. Sound recording and production by Jermaine Hamilton at Pacific Grove Soundworks. We love hearing from you! Contact us at dorktalesstorytime@gmail.com or try our one-way text feature as a safe way to reach out. You can find even more ways to reach us in the show notes.

Now, go be the hero of your own story and we’ll see you next once-upon-a-time!